Dunwall Tower Master Bedroom shitter!

Here’s some more Before & After Action brought to you by the Designing House of Brigmore. At the start of the game, this is possibly the first shitter you see. It is located at the end of the hall of the Bedchamber Suite. What I’m assuming is that Emily and Corvo share this, as neither of their bedrooms have private shitters. This room provides a convenient spot to stash the body of the guard you choke out in the hall (just plunk him right into the bathtub).

You see this room again when you return to Dunwall Tower to eliminate Delilah for good. The Royal Washroom got a facelift, and a faceplant right into some conjured brambles! To get this LOOK for yourself, take any container you see, tip its contents on the floor, and use the mess to anchor a bunch of tallow candles. Your guests will appreciate the bathtub daybed, complete with Hug-Me Hartebeest Head. Random wig stands provide the perfect “Je ne sais quoi dafuq” that you need to keep your visitors nervous and guessing. Break and stain shit, but don’t smooth out the original wrinkles in the floor coverings, especially if you love the sound of guests clenching their teeth until they crack.

Dunwall Tower Storage Room shitter!

As you exit the Kaldwin Saferoom, through the back door and onto the rooftops of the city, you must pass through a narrow corridor stuffed with the things that rich people hang onto, like extra couches and paintings (like, four dozen couches and paintings). In your haste to get to the meat and potatoes of the game, you might say to yourself (as I did), “Surely there wouldn’t be a shitter in here.” Au contraire, Brigade! It is yet unclear if this shitter is supposed to just be stored here, or if anyone actually uses it. I guess if you wanted to toss the contents out over the city of Dunwall when you’re through, that’s your perogative as a member of the ruling elite.

Kaldwin Saferoom shitter!

Emily Kaldwin’s super secret clubhouse is festooned with all the comforts and privileges a lil Empress could desire. That means platters of fresh, firm fruit, crisp bedlinens and laundered coverlets, and shelves of stiffly-bound books, trinkets, memorabilia, and baubles. There are two iron-clad safes full of gold bullion, and a humming furnace. It even has a secret entrance (accessible only with a special key that is in the form of the Royal Signet ring). Seems the perfect place to cuddle up with a copy of Tale of the Mariner’s Voyage, and hide from one’s responsibilities for hours.

Well, you can fuck right off with that highborn shit, because Delilah Copperspoon is here off the mean streets of Dunwall with some decorating ideas of her own. And she prefers to use Nature’s Palette of tracked-in grime and runoff rainwater! Clutch your pearls! The Designing House of Brigmore demands a looser grip on that stuffy notion of “a reasonable degree of filth.” When Delilah wrested control of this circus, she blasted that locked door right off its hinges and did away with the posh linens, satins, and silks. Gone are the snacks and the knick-knacks! Gone are yesterday’s useless heirlooms (note that poor Mrs. Pilsen has been tossed right in the fucking toilet)! This isn’t even the full room. This is just the part of the room with the shitter in it. Elsewhere in the Saferoom, there was a marble carving of a female figure, but when Delilah took over, she replaced it with an actual human man encased in splintery black witch crystals.

What do you say, Brigade? Which version is better: Rich Girl’s Refuge, or Profane Pigsty?

Dunwall Tower shitter!

A private citizen is holed up in this bathroom in Dunwall Tower. He’s scared to leave because there’s a killer robot roaming the hall outside the blocked-up door, but you can get in by crawling through an opening near the ceiling. Once inside, you’ll be able to reassure him that help is on the way and he’ll be rescued from Delilah very soon, but mostly you’re here to check out the shitter.

Don’t worry about him, the dude’s hierarchy of needs are more than met. There’s some shitter food in here and I know he’s got plenty of that desalinated tap water fresh from the sea waters surrounding Dunwall Tower. He’s got a couple of dressmaker dummies for company and some lorebooks for when he gets bored. A shitter is the best possible place to have to hide out in the event of a Witchcraft Coup.

Royal Conservatory shitter!

Here’s a room that was created for the sole purpose of making sure there was a shitter in this building. Thank you very much, Arkane Studios. There’s nothing in this room aside from a functioning toilet, a dead guy, and two bullets.

Duke Abele’s Royal Guards’ shitter!

The Duke lives steeped in opulence in the nouveau-riche, modern expressionist Royal Palace, that sports a ghastly cast plaster exterior. Aramis Stilton has more taste, and I think the Duke is trying to play catch-up. Abele spent a lot of cash on his palace, but cut corners on the facilities for his support staff. I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t want to shit here. It is slightly less dreary than a workcamp barracks, and Duke Abele obviously didn’t feel the need to spring for any kind of floor coverings, a second sink, or even a second coat of paint. The shitter itself is fine; it is innocent, and is just trying to do its job.

In case you were wondering, no, I didn’t incapacitate these guards, they were already slumped over drunk when I got here!

Stilton Manor Guest Bathroom shitter!

An exquisite guest bath featuring a rip in the very fabric of time. Speaking of fabric and time, it’s interesting to see the dirty laundry has remained unshifted in both past and present. Note the fabulous addition of mannequin heads in both the tub and the shitter bowl. A unique feature of this shitter, aside from the whole timewarp thing, is the alcove-type nook with interrogation lighting. Sit your ass down and explain your shit, Stilton!

Dunwall Tower Hallway shitter!

You might recognize this spot from the first Dishonored, as the location where the Lord Regent is arrested after you expose his crimes via loudspeaker. Just look at how the plucky Brigmore Witches have transformed this dull, ordinary hallway into a cluster of shit stalls, decorated with profane scrawlings and filth! These ladies really know how to make a house a home. If you need to get all dolled up for a visit from the Duke, this is the spot to get fresh, pretty and demure. What do you think you’d find if you turned that chamber pot in the middle rightside-up? I’m fully certain there’d be a nice bouquet of colorful roses.

Paolo’s shitter!

Slippery eel and Outsider enthusiast Paolo (no last name, because he is a standalone rockstar) calls a near-empty apartment above the Crone’s Hand Pub home. This is Paolo’s very own shitter - Notice there is no toilet! I don’t think he’s using that bucket, either. Paolo is a sorcerer who can transfigure into a cloud of rats like Sewer Dracula, so he might not need a normal shitter at all. I can definitely imagine this grimy little weasel crimelord just blooming into a swarm of rats and shitting all over the city that way.

Fun Fact: The character Paolo is voiced by Pedro Pascal!