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Posted on May 30, 2024

Apartment shitter!

You thought the people you had to share a suite with were pigs? This is a whole new level, in fact this is the 2007 level of Unpacking. This was my least favorite level because of the gross housemates. I lived with people like this once and can definitely say I would never do this again and would not recommend it to anyone. First of all TRUST ME, your housemates ARE using all your shit that you leave out in any area they deem to be “fair use.” The rest of this level is insane. You can almost smell the living room spilling over with cosplay and anime crap and dining area where they just have an eternal Dungeons & Dragons game going for the rest of their lives. No to everything. And in here, it’s just obnoxious. The shampoo bottles on the floor because they’re the jumbo size bigger than the trash can. Do not store your TP rolls and menstrual products on the FLOOR under the SINK, what is wrong with you? I also really do not get this concept of keeping a razor out on an open shelf like first of all that’s germs, second that’s not safe. Oh good thing you have a naked bar of soap on the sink surround like for cleaning your little hands, and all that? It’s not going to get disgusting and absolutely cemented there or anything. Listen roommates, if you have this much shit, keep it in a caddy in your own bedroom. And there was MORE (note the unopened box on the floor). Also, is that just a washer, or just a dryer? It’s not a combo, let me reassure you right now there is no way in hell the landlord of this place is shelling out that kind of cash for people who will probably break it before the lease is up. In Two Thousand and SEVEN.

unpacking
shitter

Posted on May 30, 2024

University Suite shitter!

This is the shitter you get in 2004 when you leave home and move into a suite of fools at the University. I chose to take a picture of it like this because this is how I would have it look if I lived there. But because this is Unpacking, the most relaxing and absolutely chill way to wait around for a Zoom-based webinar to get to the fucking point in the history of mankind, ALAS, you must festoon this otherwise perfect shrine with knick-knacks and sundries. There’s a bunch of random shit you have to stick around various rooms and sometimes it’s your own space, and other times it’s a situation where you’re sharing a spot with other people. This is the first level where you get to see a bathroom. Apparently you’re sharing this dorm space with other people so it’s hardly ideal. Storing your toothbrush on the sink surround, I could never. Ew. No, you’d never find me leaving my belongings laying around a shared bathroom. Sorry, dorms are notoriously pest-ridden and I also have no reason to trust you idiots who are probably going to fail out after months of stumbling around in a hungover haze and using my hair comb for god knows what.

unpacking
shitter

Posted on May 29, 2024

Obra Dinn shitter!

This is a shitter on the Crew Deck of the Obra Dinn in Return of the Obra Dinn. From this angle you can see the corpse of a certain man, who I will not identify, because that would be a spoiler. Elsewhere in the game, you overhear a guy die while using the shitter, but that’s in another part of the boat entirely and there’s not even a shitter there. I think he was just taking a full DUMP in a crawlspace like a filthy dirtbag. This act of VANDALISM is only hinted at through the audible memory of his death that you listen to through your special Memento Mori pocket watch, right before he’s squeezed like a tube of Colgate by the Kraken. This game is fucking amazing by the way and I recommend it without reservation.

obra dinn
shitter

Posted on May 28, 2024

Apartment Horror shitters!

From our current Bucket Brigadier of the Year Rockin T these are two shitters from the indie horror game Flesh, Blood, and Concrete. Top Image: “Still quite early in the game but basically my car is fucked, so now I’m walking around a strange apartment building with only one family as its inhabitants.” Bottom Image: “Now THIS one is more interesting. That girl next to me is one of the inhabitants of the apartment building, and the whole building has become more like dreamlike and fucked up horror-y.” Loving the “Lived Experience” art installation on this bathroom!

flesh blood and concrete
shitter

Posted on May 27, 2024

The Merry Christmas shitter!

From Bucket Brigadier of the Year Rockin T! “Miles Morales is a sequel spin-off thing to the first Spider-Man game. Peter Parker’s going on vacation sorta, so Miles is left in charge as the sole Spider-Man for a bit. It’s Christmas and the dude kneeling is looking for bleach to clean a stain. I can’t walk close to the toilet bc the guy (Ganke) can’t be moved past. I’m pretty close to the beginning of the game, but I’m fairly certain it’ll stop being Christmas. There’s something charming about it. You can even see it snowing outside through that window in the back.”

Very nicely designed and you the spectator are kept a celebrity’s distance away from this stunning shitter, wearing what looks to be a Chanel suit.

spiderman
shitter
bucket brigade

Posted on May 26, 2024

Slurry Lagoon shitter!

This is a no entry point! Bedraggled and probably full of spiders is this shitter submitted by ILikeSocks! “I’m infiltrating a terrorist militia in Colorado. It’s part of Hitman: World of Assassination which is the rebooted trilogy’s name, mission # idr. The “new” one. There’s the old Hitman games, then they came out with…Absolution? Something like that, but it was more actiony. Then they rebooted with these games, so it’s Hitman 1, but it’s really like Hitman 5.” Pretty obvious this series was rebooted just to upgrade the shitter optics.

hitman
shitter
bucket brigade

Posted on May 26, 2024

Emancipate these shitters!

Free them! Why are these shitters corralled at the rear of this event like they’re waiting for the bus to Correctional Vocation Training? Cruelly excluded from the lively celebration taking place nearby, overcrowded, and provided no sun shelter?? It’s gotta be 112 degrees in those shitters. Luckily, our brigadier ILikeSocks was there taking hidden video and still shots for the upcoming expose on Inside Edition, A Current Affair, Hard Copy, and Rock Bottom and drag the dismal treatment of our dear shitters into the light.

hitman
shitter
bucket brigade

Posted on May 26, 2024

“Don’t worry, I got revenge.”

Ordinarily I would not condone the use of shitters as weapons, but there were extenuating circumstances. Of course, the clothes you change into are covered in stinky porta-potty water, so idk how great of a disguise it is.

hitman
shitter
bucket brigade

Posted on May 26, 2024

ICUP shitter!

Submitted by Bucket Brigadier ILikeSocks! Impressive multi-reflection graphics in this Hitman shitter that shows Agent 47, Agent 47’s mirror image, the mirror images of the dudes right outside the window, and the dudes outside the window themselves. Imagine the dudes outside getting screamed at by a drill sergeant and they look up and see you staring at them from the throne. “The shitter could use more polygons or something, idk. Also it looks like they have one shitter asset per level, and then they change the room its in. So like. It’s always vanilla cake, but the frosting is pretty dope.”

hitman
shitter
bucket brigade

Posted on May 26, 2024

Black Heart, Yellow Silk shitter!

What in The King And I hell is this? From Bucket Brigadier ILikeSocks from Hitman #6 (also called just HITMAN because Agent 47 needs you to use small words). “Gotta break into some rich spa health resort in Hokkaido, first thing I did was find my room’s shitter.” Something quite funny about this baldy stalking around with all the grace of a chest freezer in this delicate yellow silk robe. Hey, the pattern kind of matches your beauty mark on the back of your shiny bald dome. By the way, nobody could exactly stop you from just fucking off and living here forever. You’d just have to kill anyone who tried to evict you.

hitman
shitter
bucket brigade

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