Soul-Crushing Burden of Capitalism shitter!

Ready to play a game? It’s called How Good Do You Have It and this game is fun and easy! To participate, you’re gonna head to Sleepcrate, a kicky concept hotel at Ebbside, the most dreadful fish market at the rear of a deafening nightclub! Once there, buy a Mystery Parcel for a cool 1000 creds. Let’s open ‘er up! Facts you may find fun: The mystery parcel is an entire aluminum shipping container and was actually somebody’s house. Here it is! What did you win? Surprise, it’s a shitter, a layoff, and a creepy feeling that your own life could be a lot worse!

Abandoned Outpost of Agamon A shitter!

Agamon A (a moon of Agamon) has this shitter you’ll find there if the gods are good. Not just abandoned, but underfunded, this outpost has an Arts & Crafts slapped-together feel. The shitter has 2% privacy opacity (I’m sure the ‘accidents’ are directly related to that) and the lighting/aura of Psychotronics. Hover over the image to see the bowl. This place gives me the heebie-jeebies! No need, however. There’s like 1 total thing in the entire game that could even remotely hurt you and it ain’t here, don’t worry, fella. So go ahead, squat in peace!

Dead Drop shitter!

Is it? While approaching Wyrm’s Rock your blinky-balls will zero in like a friggin F/A-18 Hornet on this splintery little stall stapled to the outside of Lord Gortash’s Loire Valley-looking white granite stronghold. I mean wtf is it if not a shitter. We all know it was en vogue for evil castle-dwelling gremlins to just open a hole in the side of the wall and shit through that. Tywin Lannister did it. I was unable to angle the camera to see if there was a little hole on the bottom, and there’s no way to find it from the interior, but there are ZERO shitters inside this entire castle so idk wtf else it could be. It’s just the style of a shithead like Gortash to have only one phantom shitter for himself and none for the hundreds of servants who wait on him hand and foot. We’ve seen it before. Gosh, wouldn’t it have been amazing to corner Gortash’s crumby soul in this little commode and just flush him out like a dirty turd?

They said it couldn’t be done

Ten years. Over 800 shitters, with hundreds of Bucket Brigadiers and over 600 beautiful human beings each month come to gawk, marvel, question, and contemplate them. THANK YOU for letting me fill the Darwinian niche nobody thought you could need! Let’s count on another 10 glorious shitter-hunting years. Noli oblivisci, supervixi.

The 2023 Blue Bowl Award goes to…

The long wait is over, the 2023 Blue Bowl Awards are finally here! As we say good-bye to 2023, let us reflect on a year of incredible shitters and our dedicated brigadiers who provided so many beautiful screenshots that it took me days of solitary contemplation to narrow it down. Behold our final contenders:

  1. State of Decay - Build-a-Shitter Workshop! This camp upgrade is a testament to the dire needfuls which abound in survival shitting. The tearful desperation and gritted-toothed optimism is so obvious it’s making us wince as we cast our eyes over and then away from the “stiff breeze”-proof framing and the “work in progress” privacy features! This contender was submitted by bucket brigadier ILikeSocks.
  2. Hello Charlotte - Most Pleasant Personality! As you advance in this game you might want to close your eyes and take three calming breaths and remember the last nice thing you encountered before climbing the tower of nightmares - it was a shitter with apple pie-scented tp! How nice! You’re going to want to take some with you as you endure the remaining trials of this story. Submitted by bucket brigadier Mahilo.
  3. Heavy Rain - Witness Protection! Thanks for completely fucking up this shitter’s life, Madison!
  4. Cyberpunk 2077 - Last Friend on Earth! In a world where most say “Not Me” this shitter says “I WILL!” Because somebody has to, god damn it all. I’m sure the shitter appreciated the offerings of myrrh or a toolbox or whatever that thing is that was laid at its feet, truly this prison shitter is a future-future saint in our very presence.

And the winner is… The Resident Evil 4 Remake Cubbyhole Shitter! Another three point touchdown from ILikeSocks. This shitter has everything we want in a great safari discovery:

  • Giving Thrills: Where terror and delight meet, we find this shitter. You don’t want to open that door, but god help you if you don’t! This is what shitter hunting is all about. Leave no stone unturned in the quest for the quintessential shitter of fear.

  • Bardic Storytelling: This scene is constructed beautifully, with a supporting actor of its own - the ogre holding the shitter hostage!

  • 2024 Mood: A great way to start this new year. This shitter is Sustainable! Why throw away a perfectly good Resident Evil: Village resource that took hours to create and was only used once? And this shitter is Modular! It fits right under the stairs in a hidden storage nook. Lastly, this shitter has Diminished Carbon Footprint! It uses no water whatsoever. Water is a finite resource, within or without the apocalypse, so well done to the people who used to live here for thinking ahead.

Great graphics are also a big plus. The Blue Bowl shitter is a prestigious award that is handed out each year to an exceptional shitter, and signifies a $25 donation to the sanitation charity of our choice in 2024. Now get comfortable in your seat as 2024 begins! There are so many shitters to discover!

Announcing the 2023 Bucket Brigadier of the Year!

Gaming Thrones consists of an army of shitter hunters who flood my notifications with exquisite screenshots and among many, one has stood out this year as the most eagle-eyed of all - Rockin T, who submitted so many shitters I couldn’t even post them all in 2023. There are currently 8 of Rockin T’s shitter snaps up on this blog, and many more that are still waiting to be revealed. Please enjoy this interview of our 2023 Brigadier, as she grants us insight into her ways and means:

“A pic of my dog Blizzard Snowball McFluffyface (Blizzy for short), using my Skyrim pillow and chilling next to my spider plushie Charlie! The pillow has the quote “Hey, you. You’re finally awake” which is really funny to see when you wake up in the morning.”

What were some of the best games you played in 2023?

“I loved Jedi: Survivor and Outer Worlds! Jedi: Survivor really expanded beyond the scope of the first game. I had a lot of fun changing up Cal’s appearance (#LongHairCalForLife), getting to know Skoova Stev, and customizing my lightsaber! Outer Worlds was also so so fun as someone who loves Fallout: New Vegas. I love Parvati with my whole entire heart. Also, shout-out to honorable mentions Yakuza 4 and the Resident Evil 3/4 REmakes. OH AND Life Makeover! It’s a dress-up/mystery game that I’ve played every day for months that I like a lot.”

What games are you playing right now?

“I’m technically in the middle of Ocarina of Time, the Ace Attorney trilogy, Yakuza: Dead Souls, Separate Ways (REmake 4), Outer Worlds (the DLCs), Sonic and the Secret Rings, and Balder’s Gate 3. I bounce between consoles that I have at school and at home, so I’m a bit all over the place!”

How do you feel about being the Bucket Brigadier of 2023?

“It’s an honor! I told my brother and he had me repeat myself about 5 times trying to figure out if I was saying actual words. I had never given much thought to toilets/bathrooms in video games before, but now I get excited when I find one! It’s like a scavenger hunt and I’ve got my eyes PEELED. It’s especially exciting when some kind of encounter happens IN the bathroom.”

Thank you, Rockin T for all you do to enhance and enrich the diversity of our shitter compendium. You have a winner’s mindset when it comes to Shitter Safari. Rockin T worked really hard for this award, and she deserves it. In honor of Rockin T’s commitment to Gaming Thrones, $25 will be donated to the sanitation charity of our choice in 2024. Please look forward to the Blue Bowl Awards, coming soon!

Flooded District shitter!

If you go exploring in the Flooded District you’ll find it, well, flooded. Yeah, pretty amazing, right? They could turn this into an attraction with gondolas or body surfing but no. There’s just remnants of a crumbled civilization down there… and this is no place for a shitter! This is Empress Emily Kaldwin’s legacy!

Questionable Upgrade shitter!

Are we sure this is an improvement? Certainly the bathtub, but this washroom in Aramis Stilton’s renovated mansion has only an outrageously opulent bathtub, complete with Roman edifice, while the shitter (a humble chamberpot) has been replaced with NOTHING. Now, ordinarily this would be inexcusable, however, the upgraded Stilton mansion has four separate new bathrooms, some with multiple shitters!

Waning Moon Tavern shitter!

Amid the chasms and megaflora swallowing up an entire city lies the quaint and loot-laden Waning Moon Tavern. It used to be a watering hole for jolly, plump, rosy-cheeked lads but for the last century it’s been fucked sideways by evil. Reithwin was the quintessential medieval stopover, all Dutch Tudor homes n’ stone byways n’ shit, but now it’s been shadow-cursed up the ass. I think it’s safe to say there’s not enough infrastructure-boosting bipartisan funding in the universe that’ll put it back in order. What’s now a splintering barfbag saloon has ONE potty stall with a CORPSE in it. The shitter is always your final friend!
The outhouse was a great choice for a place to kick the ol’ bucket but when the angels descend, they descend not for thee! The shitter is the only sinless, blameless, perfect little lamb that has been through a LOT and is ready to be assumed into heaven both body and soul.

From one of the greatest minds behind Skyrim, Fallout, and Marvel Anatomy…

comes a big adventure comic about a little skeleton!

I recently had the opportunity to chat with Jonah Lobe, an artist whose visionary work has delighted and mesmerized over 115 million people worldwide. Jonah has gifted our human race with the endearing and unforgettable, such as the Skyrim giants and the masks of the Dragon Priests, as well as the terrifying and UNFORGIVABLE, like the deathclaws and bloodbugs of Fallout 4. This time, Jonah is leaning toward the charming and inspiring in his new project Quiet: Level One. In the words of the artist, this project is “an epic fantasy about a mute little skeleton who must defeat a rampaging barbarian before he can cut down the Tree of Worlds. The story is cute, whimsical, scary and fun.” Check out the link in the image source to get a peek at the project, and of course give him a follow on Quiet Level One Instagram, to get the latest updates.