Your the dumbass, dumbass.

“Propping it up on cinderblocks was the smart.”

Seal of Exile, by Fesbra for Rhino Games.

High Judge Orivand’s shitter!

Full disclosure: I had actually taken a pic of this one myself, but my screenshot totally sucked so I found this excellent version on the guides website (referenced below). Admittedly, the guide was trying to highlight the quest item on the table there but you and I both know that we are here for the antiquated crap bucket.

High Judge Orivand shits in all his high-falutin glory in this friggin place - a crumbling fortress decked out in iron bars and coarse, red hempen banners. He has a very fancy bath, where he likes to scrubadub all under his judgmental fingernails and between his inquisitorial toes. That bucket next to the washtub? We all know what that is. The servant who brings the water isn’t leaving the water bucket there and there’s no water in this scene anyway so don’t even start with me. What you are looking at is the genuine article: A shit bucket from the Dark Ages!

The Merryweather Prison shitter!

So you’re on your way to sunny Fort Joy, a vacation destination of relaxation and recreation? Well fella, I hope for your sake that your ticket says The Merryweather, a steamship of unsurpassed luxury. With entertainment venues on every deck! Here’s the exclusive VIP cabin. Though your bunk is connected securely to the floor via direct contact, just close your eyes to experience virtual hammock-swaying action, thanks to the turbulent rolling of furious ocean waves. Water isn’t leaking in from the walls and ceiling, it’s actively freshening the air with a seasalt spray! The lumps in the corners are just lumps. Try not to think about them! Or touch them. Wave to your neighbor through the rusty rustic room-dividing privacy curtain! You have a shitter and he doesn’t. That’s what makes this bunk VIP. No in-transit food will be served. Bon voyage.

2001: A Space Odyssey Concept Art

“If you saw Stanley Kubrick’s classic motion picture 2001: A Space Odyssey, chances are you were attracted to it by posters featuring the paintings of Robert McCall. His vision of the wheel-shaped space station and of space-suited astronauts on the Moon have adorned movie theaters and art museums around the world.”

Captain America’s very own shitter!

Submitted by bucket brigadier Casper! Can you believe this shit? This tiny-ass cramped little closet looking like it belongs in a RV is Captain America’s own throne? This humble bowl? Tell us about it, Casper:

*It’s inside his room on the Chimera. Well each Avenger has their own shitter, so there are tecnically 7 Avenger poopers. There is also a crew quarters, but I can’t get in there, so I have no idea how many are there. Each bathroom looks the exact same, haha.”

Well, there you have it, difficult as it might be to fathom that even the actor who plays Captain America would feel enthusiasm over the prospect. I’m including the second picture as proof because this is one lackluster little loo.

Oh, sorry. Am I interrupting?

Today’s content dump is brought to you by bucket brigadier Azi!!

“The best part is it flushes when she gets off. So you cant be like, ‘Well, maybe she’s just sitting.’ God dammit I talked to her and she sat down again. Good luck Ankha.”

Animal Crossing: New Horizons with ultra-realistic decorating interface.

Dayspring Settlement Outhouse!

Submitted by bucket brigadier Azi! This non-interactable outhouse is located in the settlement of Dayspring. To see inside, our intrepid brigadier had to angle his camera all crazy-like. His report: “Since you asked, there are some shitters in New World. Extremely basic on the inside, I expect improvements before launch.” Inside the outhouse we can see there is a seat. That’s good! But, I consider the amount of care and attention in the design of a game’s shitters to be a reflection of the depth and detail you’ll get from the gaming experience in general, so improvements? I certainly fucking hope so! Can you hear the people cry out, Amazon Game Studios? They are saying, “Make Better Shitters!”

The Private Latrines of Ancient Rome!

Apparently August 26 is National Toilet Paper Day? And you know how I would like to celebrate this day - by talking about what life would be like without toilet paper. A lot of people on Earth don’t even use toilet paper, opting instead for things like straw, corn cobs, or just their hand, not to mention bidets which are enjoying quite the surge in popularity just lately. But check out this amazing diagram that illustrates how a toilet from ancient Rome might have looked: Instead of toilet paper, ancient people would have used a xylospongium, or tersorium. Essentially a sea sponge tied to a stick, this was was actually shared in public toilets. The tersorium was washed after each use with vinegar and salt water, which allegedly sanitized the object.

I don’t think I’d be down to try that, but what is intriguing about this article from the Manchester Museum is the diagram of the ancient toilet itself. Apparently the back-up of methane gases could cause actual explosions, however, this does seem an interesting concept to build from, for when society crumbles and we are feeling reluctant to start digging 6-foot deep pits for our composting toilets. Maybe I’m just bewitched by the elegance of that toga.