Posted on January 5, 2024
The 2023 Blue Bowl Award goes to…
The long wait is over, the 2023 Blue Bowl Awards are finally here! As we say good-bye to 2023, let us reflect on a year of incredible shitters and our dedicated brigadiers who provided so many beautiful screenshots that it took me days of solitary contemplation to narrow it down. Behold our final contenders:
- State of Decay - Build-a-Shitter Workshop! This camp upgrade is a testament to the dire needfuls which abound in survival shitting. The tearful desperation and gritted-toothed optimism is so obvious it’s making us wince as we cast our eyes over and then away from the “stiff breeze”-proof framing and the “work in progress” privacy features! This contender was submitted by bucket brigadier ILikeSocks.
- Hello Charlotte - Most Pleasant Personality! As you advance in this game you might want to close your eyes and take three calming breaths and remember the last nice thing you encountered before climbing the tower of nightmares - it was a shitter with apple pie-scented tp! How nice! You’re going to want to take some with you as you endure the remaining trials of this story. Submitted by bucket brigadier Mahilo.
- Heavy Rain - Witness Protection! Thanks for completely fucking up this shitter’s life, Madison!
- Cyberpunk 2077 - Last Friend on Earth! In a world where most say “Not Me” this shitter says “I WILL!” Because somebody has to, god damn it all. I’m sure the shitter appreciated the offerings of myrrh or a toolbox or whatever that thing is that was laid at its feet, truly this prison shitter is a future-future saint in our very presence.
And the winner is… The Resident Evil 4 Remake Cubbyhole Shitter! Another three point touchdown from ILikeSocks. This shitter has everything we want in a great safari discovery:
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Giving Thrills: Where terror and delight meet, we find this shitter. You don’t want to open that door, but god help you if you don’t! This is what shitter hunting is all about. Leave no stone unturned in the quest for the quintessential shitter of fear.
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Bardic Storytelling: This scene is constructed beautifully, with a supporting actor of its own - the ogre holding the shitter hostage!
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2024 Mood: A great way to start this new year. This shitter is Sustainable! Why throw away a perfectly good Resident Evil: Village resource that took hours to create and was only used once? And this shitter is Modular! It fits right under the stairs in a hidden storage nook. Lastly, this shitter has Diminished Carbon Footprint! It uses no water whatsoever. Water is a finite resource, within or without the apocalypse, so well done to the people who used to live here for thinking ahead.
Great graphics are also a big plus. The Blue Bowl shitter is a prestigious award that is handed out each year to an exceptional shitter, and signifies a $25 donation to the sanitation charity of our choice in 2024. Now get comfortable in your seat as 2024 begins! There are so many shitters to discover!